What is Love Addiction?
You may be struggling with love addiction if you...
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Have difficulty being alone.
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Often feel an instant closeness and complete connection with a person you just met.
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Have a pattern of repeating toxic or unfulfilling relationships.
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Believe you will finally find happiness when you meet the right partner.
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Are unable to leave a relationship even after it's become abusive or disengaged.
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Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.
1 Corinthians 13: 4-6
AN UNQUENCHABLE DESIRE
Love addiction causes a person to become consumed in the pursuit of love, romance, or fantasy, usually at any cost. We were all created to be relational beings, but for the individual who struggles with love addiction, the desire to gain another person's love, acceptance, and approval becomes an obsession, which often hinders other areas of their lives. Much like a person who struggles with substance abuse, a love addict can experience a “high” from being pursued by or receiving the adoration of a potential partner. However, because this initial infatuation is often rooted in deficiency, the euphoria of the early encounters usually does not last, leaving the love addict hopelessly craving the “high” they originally experienced.
BLIND SPOTS
Much of this dynamic is subconscious to the love addict. She may be helplessly unaware of the root causes of her addictive behaviors or of the emptiness inside, which grows with every failed relationship or perceived rejection. Because the love addict is operating from a lack of self-awareness, she insists on repeating the cycle over and over again, either with the same partner or multiple partners, desperately hoping for her happily ever after. Instead, this constant need for love and acceptance causes individuals to go from one relationship to another or stay in a relationship even after it's become toxic, abusive, or disengaged. Consequently, love addition does not only manifest itself in our romantic relationships. It also infiltrates our friendships, work interactions, as well as our relationships with family members.
There is Hope!
The solution to getting off the roller coaster of love addiction is not to find the “right” partner or to write off relationships altogether, but to identify the wounded areas within ourselves, which are fueling our thoughts, choices, and actions. Allow me to help you identify the blind spots and gain the self-awareness necessary to break free from the bondage of love addiction. Let's work together as you discover a life filled with peace, love, and purpose.
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